Belt Auction

My sister-in-law's father was arrested for burglary, should I allow his granddaughter in my home?

He was arrested on 3 counts of burglary, one of which was against an 80 year old couple who lived down the road. It turns out he had two prior convictions for the same thing from as far back as 20 years ago... My sister-in-law just makes up excuses for him, and says that we're all over-reacting... He used the excuse during his plea hearing that he only did it because he's bipolar and addicted to Vicodin and alcohol... So, the pansy judge let him off the hook... he got 3 years probation as long as he gets "counseling" and doesn't drink anymore... Which I think is BULL CRAP. We found out that he was using our adorable 4 year old niece as a way to gain people's trust. He was an auctioneer (before they fired him for this whole burglary thing), and he would bring her to trade shows and private seller meetings and have her charm people to get information from them about what valuables they owned. He apparently used to do this with his own daughter too (my sister-in-law, my niece's mom)... We just found all of this out a couple months ago when we saw it in the paper... She didn't even bother to tell us... I should mention that my niece is not my biological niece, she's sort of a step-niece, no legal relation to me. My grandmother (who was very wealthy) passed away about two weeks before he was arrested. My sister-in-law and my niece had visited her house once while she was sick just a month earlier. There was never a problem with my grandma's security system until after she passed and nobody was at the house. The security system was set off three nights in a row and someone had pulled out a small vent above the porch door (we were assuming they were trying to find the wiring for the alarm on that door). After we heard he was arrested for burglary, we thought it could have been him trying to break in... I've already decided that my sister-in-law is not welcome in my home (her father isn't either, but that goes without saying). She knew what her father was and what he did, and now she's an adult and not only does she seem like she's okay with what he does and makes excuses for him, but now she lets her daughter be around him and be subject to the same circumstances, the same ones that she was in when she was younger (and to all I know, she could still be working with him, because she's acted very suspiciously at my parents' house a few times, walking in and out of bedrooms and the basement and garage for no reason). My question is, should I let my niece (his granddaughter) over to my house at all? I don't have as many valuables as my parents do (and grandmother did), but I still don't want her casing the place for him, because she still see's him on a regular basis. What would you do if you were in my situation? I don't want to take it out on the kid, because I know it's not her fault that her mother and grandfather are absolute psychopaths, but at the same time I don't want to leave myself vulnerable to her family. What would you do?

Public Comments

1. Well, it is really your choice. On one hand it would be very risky to let her stay at your house. On the other hand if she stays with you, you could influence her to do better things instead of learning from the parents. I, personally, would try to influence her and spent time with her.
2. if you don't feel Comfortable, i wouldn't do it
3. You have a right to feel some security in your own home. No it is not the childs fault but she is being used which is also not her fault but it does not mean you should leave yourself vulnerable and paranoid about what could happen. I would probably not have anything to do with that whole family, at least while he is loose. But I would pray for the little girl. I understand your guilt feelings for not wanting her around but what can you do when people use a child? I know I would never let my granddaughter play with anyone whose parents are psychopathic. It is a tough world and we do the best we can with what we have and know.
4. No way, she may be 4 years old, but she has inherited a lot of her father's personality.